Thursday, July 1, 2010

On Self Development

I have been lazy to write, but that does not mean I have been lacking in thoughts about what I want to write about. I store the thoughts in my mind and bring them out when I get the time and the mood to sit down, switch off the TV and type (of course the break in the World Cup in between the Round of 16 and the quarter finals made the switching off of the TV much easier).

Will's car was broken into a few weeks ago (if this sounds like deja vu, Will was mugged a few months' ago - so this has been an unfortunate year for my fiance). The passenger window was smashed, glove box was rummaged through and an empty knapsack was stolen. Although financially he got off ok (he could have suffered much worse material losses), break-in's are always a nuisance because of the things you need to fix and the insurance you need to worry about whether to claim or not to claim.

This happened early in the morning when we were still half-asleep from the night before, which was the time of the day when one tends to be grumpiest. And Will is one of the most easily agitated person I know. So I was very surprised, and impressed, when Will reacted with a "HOI what are you doing?" to the boy who was fishing about in his car (who then quickly scampered away) and then with still calmness as he decided what he needed to do to mitigate the severity of the situation given he had to show up at work in a couple of hours.

There are people who are generally calm, but react negatively to pressure, and there are also people who, on the other hand, are generally high-strung but react calmly when required. I believe there is a lot of strength in the ability to deal with bad situations calmly. It is not easy, and real personalities emerge when put under the test. Isn't it much easier, when someone does or says something that irritates you or offend your core belief, to just let your head get dizzy with anger and let them have a piece of your mind, than to be rational and calm and ignore their ignorant comments with the knowledge that a bad reaction may lead to worse outcomes?

Many arguments, fights and wars break out as a result of different parties not being able to see eye to eye, with little tolerance for differences. Much violence and regrettable incidents could have been avoided with either or all parties remaining calm. You know you cannot prevent unfavourable events from happening to you or your family, but the least you can do is to ensure your mind bears the right thoughts when they do occur and that you are not going to let the unfavourable events carry on any further.

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